twin flame love

Throughout the course of your life, you will experience many different types of love.  And while English uses the word “love” to describe them all, the ancient Greeks described 3 distinct types of love.

Eros refers to sexual or passionate love.  Philia, or deep friendship, describes a relationship built on companionship, dependability, and trust.  The Greek word agape refers to the universal respect and regard we feel toward all living beings.  

However, Twin Flame love is distinct from all of these, although it can occur between lovers, family members, friends and strangers alike.

Twin Flame love is possible in any relationship, not just in the context of a romantic partnership.  Your twin flame may be someone you feel connected to in sisterhood or someone you co-create easily within business.  It’s just as common to experience twin flame love with a family member as with the love of your life.

What distinguishes Twin Flame love from other, less impactful relationships is the quality of the connection between you.  When it comes to recognizing these people, the outer form of the relationship is not important. What is most telling is the quality of the connection.  

Here are 4 characteristics that can help you to know if you’re experiencing Twin Flame love or something else.

Characteristic #1:  You feel at home with this person.  

Whether it’s a lover or a co-worker, you’ll recognize a twin flame as a member of your tribe or soul family.  With this person, you may feel a warm sense of familiarity, even if you’ve just met. Or you may experience an unsettling sense of déjà vu – as if you’ve known each other before.  Either way, you instinctively feel that you can be yourself with this person. You feel accepted and at ease in their presence.

Characteristic #2:  You immediately feel an intense, almost uncontrollable reaction to this person.

We often think of twin flame love as feeling an inexplicable, positive pull toward someone.  But just as often, these powerful relationships are marked by a genuine feeling of disdain or even revulsion.  You will gain as much – if not more – from the turbulence between you as you do from the fun times.   

Whether your reaction is positive or negative, the intensity of your feelings what sets twin flame love apart.  The bottom line is, there is nothing neutral about this powerful connection.

Characteristic #3:  You sense you have something important to teach, or to learn from, this person.

We call people to us at particular times, depending on what our souls are ready to teach and to learn.  Your Twin Flame may stir within you an intense curiosity. As familiar as they are, there is something mysterious and unknown about them too, which you feel compelled to discover.

But just as often, they may evoke in you a desire to want to contribute to or protect them.  Both of these reactions are signs that you have been brought together for an important reason.  Regardless of the form your love takes, you will play a significant role in each other’s lives.

Characteristic #4:  Your relationship may progress faster than what you’re used to (or are comfortable with).  

Even if you have considerations or doubts about where the relationship is going, you’ll feel compelled to move forward nonetheless.  The twin flame relationship is always intense and can quickly become a main focal point in your life. Others may question your judgment, or insist that you’re moving too fast.

This person awakens you to parts of yourself that you may never have known existed.  You intuitively sense that being with them will open up new possibilities for your life.  And as a result, you find yourself feeling up for the ride, no matter where it takes you or how fast.     

When it comes to knowing if you’re experiencing Twin Flame love or something else, intuition is your primary asset.  Above all else, it’s a connection you feel and gravitate toward naturally. Not something you have to talk yourself into.

Christy Whitman is a transformational leader, celebrity coach, and the New York Times bestselling author of The Art of Having It All: A Woman’s Guide to Unlimited Abundance. For more insights like these on how to create joyous, fulfilling relationships, join her on her Conscious, Connected Coupling Podcast at or on iTunes.